One thought gets my mind racing with no aim to stop,
I am afraid, I can not get myself to say.
Would I portray myself as the faithless girl who is unable to try
The trusting faithful child, always greatful for all she has.
I am supposed to have faith, be a pillar of strength holding a 15 floor building from hitting the ground,
I am allowed to be afraid but only if the fear sparks a life changing action,
I have never been more afraid,
Counting down the days and months with no plan of what to do when the time runs out.
I have never felt so alone,
Unable to share my worries in fear of constant judgment to be bestowed upon me once more.
I have never been to stop my mind from racing,
Hoping it might ignite the next plan and purpose I am desperately in need off and keep me from failing.
I have never thought life would be cruel,
Restless I lay watching the race of my own competitors; my mind, soul and the world’s unforgiving time…